A Day in the Life of a Surviver...

I was sitting in front of my notebook which I might add is my only friend in this friendless, superficial and ultimately self centered and greedy world.

I'm a born optimist the glass always looks half full and I have always believed that good things are attracted to good, honest people like myself but I must admit that I'm waning, from years and years of experience in battle I have had to admit that I just might be wrong.

Are you introverted in anyway? Do you look at yourself and try and recognize the real you or do you go along with the flow playing catch up?

For me today was going to be different. A close friend of mine gave me an inside tip that XYLINA Corp were about to double their share price maybe even more,!”.

“Double their share value” I almost shout

“Not so loud you dumb bastard this is an inside tip I’m giving you. You can take it to the bank, I’m that sure”

“Double” I repeat in absolute awe.

XYLINA Corp was a double blue chip stock, business has been around for must be 200 years and is as solid as a rock but like all good shares its price fluctuated within a narrow band. Hell last time I looked they were steady at $137.83 too stiff to add to my meager portfolio of losers.

“Rumor has it of a possible merger with you know who. The shares stand at around $164.75 and to top it they may split at cost then double!

."God damn too expensive for me, I mean you would have to buy quite a few shares for this once in a life opportunity." Drake said regret evident in his voice. What the hell Drake was always on the winning side if it wasn’t for the horses he’d be in the Bahamas being fanned by semi-naked beautiful women a glass of Champaign in one hand and a Cuban cigar in the other.

“Whatcha thinkin’? he asked with a knowing look and smiled?”

“It’s a lot of greens Drake I mean you would want at least a hunred to make it really pay”

“Hundred! Hundred! Are you out of your fucking cotton picking brain, I’d put at least 10 times that much!" Drake responded his face flushed with indignation.

“Easy fer you to say, you ain’t putting up the money and anyway I don’t have that kind of dough.”

“Your pick my old buddy but first day’s profit we go 50-50 after all if it wasn’t for my tip you’d get nothing and I’m not a greedy man after that the rest is yours. I gotta get going tell me what you decide when we finish work.”

“OK...”

And off I sauntered but inside I became so excited that hardly had I sat down when I speed dialed my broker and with all the confidence of a Soros Sterling trader I started,

“Hiya Mike...”

“Whoa what yer sayin?”

“How does the market look to you right now, gut instinct?”

“It’s too quiet, I ain’t making any money. But it’ll pick up it always does and if it goes in either direction I stand to gain.”

“Heard anything interesting about XYLINA Corp recently?” I asked slyly

“Nothing there it moves a few pennies up and down but like I said things are kind of quiet.” Mike responded disinterested.”

“Mike listen up I want you to buy me 4 no make that 5,000 shares of XYLINA Corp.” I said with my feet propped up on my table.

“Have you lost your mind that is one hell of an investment have you heard something you old dog?”

“let’s just say a bird whispered in my ear about a takeover.”

“I haven’t even smelled the slightest hint. Are you sure? Mike said as he furtively glanced around him.

“Let’s say you can take it to the bank. Your customers would really love you not to mention all the commission and bonuses.”

“For God’s sake don’t talk like that on the phone you never know whose nose is stuck in to my line!”

And I didn’t know there were a few bugs on on my line. Who would be interested in me I was strictly small potatoes but it appears that suddenly people straightened up from their usual slouch looking for their broker’s number in their Rolodex probably thinking this dumb shit couldn’t make up something like that.

“Are you sure you want to put that much money into one company why don’t you put half and spread the rest.”

“All Mike and MIKE NOW! Once in a while a man has to take a risk a big risk to get the big returns I said philosophically and this is going to be my once in a lifetime ticket to freedom,”


Well Mike tried to talk me out of investing so much in one stock and to diversify a bit. I wouldn't hear of it after this coup I was going to start a career as a player to be watched and emulated and Mike would be my broker but he would have to listen up to my advice more and of course Drake would be my other right hand man.



Then five phones cut off and four started making a lot of phone calls.



The following day I rushed to get my newspaper from the lawn where it is delivered daily and almost fell on my ass reaching for it. I feverishly shuffled through its pages until I found the page I was looking for.I didn’t need to look far because the headline of the Financial Section read Mystery Investor Raises XYZ Corp Shares by $5 in feverish trading!” "YESSSSSSSS!!" I shouted punching my fist in the air my arm reaching the heavens as I hugged the paper in my arms...'YESSSSSSS!! YESSSSSS. The shares he had only bought yesterday had gained FIVE DOLLARS PER SHARE.



Think of it readers and rejoice with me TWO THOUSAND FIVE HUNDRED DOLLAR for a god damn phone call.



I went to work whistling for a change, my wife had no idea of what was going on was quite convinced that I had lost it big time but that night when I came home from work my arms filled with a beautiful bouquet of exquisitely arranged flowers, a bottle of Bollinger Brut Champagne and a box of the very best Belgium chocolates I gave this woman I love so much a kiss the likes of which she hadn’t received since we were courting.



She was quite overcome with my sudden ardor accompanied with a smack on her beautiful bottom as I always used to when we were so young and so in love with so many plans and everything to look forward to.  Well those days had finally arrived and I was going to give this woman everything I had ever promised her.

"Grab a shower and put on your very best dress on because my lovely wife I'm going to take you out tonight on a night the likes you've never experienced and I'll have the Bollinger on ice waiting for us when we get back home for some good old fashioned lovin'. Well go on woman get to it!"


Yes my boat had finally come in, I'd seen it on TV at the movies, read about it in the newspapers and online and now it was finally happening to me.

The next day when I ran to fetch the newspaper I noticed that the shares had lost all the previous gain from yesterday plus 10 cents has been knocked off the price.



"Suckers" I thought. "That's just profit taking, imagine how they'll be kicking themselves up the arse when the merger and split is announced, heck if they go down a little more I might even buy, I've waited all my life for this moment I can afford to wait a little longer and make even more money!’ I said laughing to myself.



And I did wait and by the end of the week they had lost about 50% of their value, buy I thought to myself and buy I did. and as each day went by the shares sunk further and further but Mike kept telling me not to be an old worry wart and he knew what he would do if he had the money.

I was becoming very nervous especially as Mike was no longer coming into the office and boost my spirits as the shares slowly but surely sank into the abyss until I didn't have to search the paper for my shares in the newspaper as the headlines that day said it all...



"XYP Corp files under chapter 11 to safeguard it from its creditors after over 200 years in business."



Why me oh Lord, I've never done a soul any harm in my entire miserable life?



Drake was nowhere to be found he had set me up and between all the people who had purchased the shares that day they had artificially raised the price and they probably all sold off and were in the Bahamas laughing at me and my dreams.

Dreams of grandeur and the easy life, the beautiful house in Hampton and the Rolls for me and a spiffy Merc for my wife had faded into the twilight of my imagination. And as I bent to pick up the newspaper I saw drops of water streaking the print, 'must be raining' I sniffle to myself as I re-entered the house despondently and finished the dregs of my now cold coffee.



Just as I was going to get out from the kitchen table my wife spoke to me...

"You know when you told me how you lost our savings..."

"Yes honey, but don't worry I'll make it up to you, you'll see, soon we'll be touring the world on a cruise ship, maybe I'll take you on the Queen Mary, you'd really get a kick out of that wouldn't you sweetheart? I'd make sure we would be invited to the Captain's table on the very first night, you just wait and see..."

I pick up my car keys that lay on on the little round table by the front door and kiss my wife goodbye to start another day of drudgery.

When my wife spoke again as I was opening the door,

"That's just it Mike, there isn't going to be a next time, because I've been having an affair and I've decided that I love him more than I love you. I'm leaving you Mike or should I rephrase that you won't be able to open the door when you come home tonight all the locks will be changed, I'm keeping the house and everything that is in it anything else that is left is yours..."

"You can't do that to me sweetheart after all we've been through together all these years you can't leave me now, just when I need you most. Who is this other man, no one can love you the way I do, you've gotta know that...!

"Drake does, don't you Drake?" My wife shouted out.

"Sure do sweetheart, now get rid of that loser and come back to bed..."

Mike finds himself out of the door now looking in at his wife with Drake's arms possessively around her shoulders and watches as she lifts one foot and kicking the door gently lets it slowly close in his face. Then a burst of laughter ring out, a giggle and the sound of his wife and Drake running up the stairs and the final slam of his bedroom door.

"Next time" I think to myself, "next time...